Muffled Noise

So. You haven’t been updating me again. I thought you said you were gonna post at least whenever something major happened? Last I heard, you’re in Hong Kong and staying for a few months even, isn’t that major enough?

No don’t try to play dumb with me, I know what you’ve been up to. Just because I’m stuck here doesn’t mean I don’t have my sources. Huh? What? Yeah I know everything! Want proof?

Yeah I know it was your first time at the NAIA Terminal 3, and I know you thought it was nice. You even took a picture while waiting for the plane because you were an hour early.

And then you almost didn’t have enough for the cab ride to the hotel because you didn’t have all your money exchanged, and you were panicking, but got there with 6 HKD to spare. Then you had enough to get from the hotel to the office, and didn’t work that day. You like the atmosphere at the office and you’re really excited about the project. I mean, that’s the kind of thing you usually blog about!

And that’s not the worst part! When you get home, you have my Write Post page open all night but what do you do instead of type? You watch movies! You watched that movie Twilight, which btw you said you didn’t really feel like watching in the first place. According to my buddy Plurk, you even thought it was just “alright” after watching it. Psh!

And that other movie, One Night with the King, was it? You watched it 5 freaking times! I know it was about your favorite story in the Bible and you liked that Luke Goss guy in it, but could you not have watched it one time less to, I don’t know, post a two-sentence update on me?

Don’t think I don’t see you munching through that giant bag of Lay’s!

Have I not been good to you? I never gave you problems when you used the auto-upgrade plugin. I didn’t randomly eat up your posts (no matter how tempting that was) and I always tried to look my best in your custom themes. I mean, I know you’re busy and all, and I know this is just a phase. But you can’t keep me out like this! It takes two to make this relationship work, that’s all I’m sayin’.

You know what, I don’t want an explanation anymore. I’m just gonna take a walk through the archives. Don’t wait up for me.

Yours truly (though you make a sucky owner sometimes),
mufflednoise.com

P.S. This week’s spam is particularly weird.