Because of certain violent reactions to my previous post, I shall never again post anything Hello Kitty on this site. Hahaha :P

Anyways, something more in-character then, and a few of you might recognize it moohaha. I hope nobody got in trouble for this:

That’s along Emerald Ave in Ortigas haha. P ARK ING. Took this picture at least a month ago, I haven’t noticed if they fixed it. Probably not. But at least they didn’t spell it wrong. Although.. I don’t think they really thought it our well, coz it actually reads “No Parking”, but the “NO” part is at the bottom of the word “Parking”, written horizontally. They must’ve been thinking of where the vehicles are coming from, but if that’s the case, won’t they read it as “GNIKRAP”? Gnodab? Hahaha XD

Anyways last but not least, happy birthday Kaiz and Ria, and belated happy birthday to my cuz Jermaine! Hope you all had good ones, and here’s to great lives ahead! Cheers~ :)

Change is good, I said in my last entry. My room is now bright and…spotty.

This wasn’t what I had in mind actually, and normally I’d insist on that. I wanted stripes, about a foot wide each. But for some reason when they asked, I just said it’s too dull and too plain — I wanted something different. The color you see on the lower part of that pic, that was the old color. So anyway, after not much thought and planning, tada. That mounted cabinet thingy in the pic, I got the idea walking around the furniture section at the department store. That was early this week. Again, tada.

And so, having this new, slightly unfamiliar room (rearranging some other stuff since I got that cabinet) made me think of why I so spontaneously decided to be so spontaneous, about something so grave and so character-defining as the color, and set-up, of my room.

When I stepped inside, I gave myself a few seconds to take it all in, and decided what I thought about it…

I had dinner with my girls again a few days back. Talking to them broke my heart so hard that I thought I’d dropped my glass. Their lives always seem to take those razor-sharp turns, and for the most part, all I could do was watch the skid marks roll down their cheeks. I mean, I’d be lying if I said I understood what they felt, but I knew I desperately wanted to.

It’s like you realize that your fears are valid, and very real, and even scarier than what you let yourself think. And you feel justified for being on the safe side. I guess that only takes you so far though.

There is no experience that you can’t learn anything from. But this is what we get for being human — we’re doomed to learn things the hard way despite how we fool ourselves into thinking we’re wise, that we take wise advice, and we’ve heeded all the warnings. It’s almost like a 50-50. You do all you can, or you jump at something without a second’s thought, either way things could go wrong. You hope you have what it takes to ride it out when that happens.

Fortunately, I really do like how my room turned out. But all things considered, this is probably as far a gamble as I’m willing to go haha.

I finally finished the future design of mufflednoise.com. It took me quite a while to finish it, and oddly enough I didn’t get stuck on the conceptualizing part. I had some trouble with what to call it, and also some little but important details haha. Well I’m glad I got this down, but I’m not really done since this is a Flash design. Ehrm.. heh, heh heh. Clicking on the image goes to my DevArt page btw.

Random good news, I suddenly have a 60GB iPod video. It’s second hand, but I didn’t ask for it or buy it myself, so it’s very welcome. I mean, I don’t really need it but.. why not eh? Tack gets my iPod nano. And I found out it’s possible to move songs from one iPod to another, you just need a special program for it. I haven’t tried it yet though.

I think I’m gonna have my room painted a lighter blue. This smokey blue is kinda…sad. Change is good.

It’s gonna be one heckuva day at work tomorrow, I guess that’s one bad thing about long weekends. Ouch.

[Edit: Btw, watch The Bourne Ultimatum. If you haven't seen Identity and Supremacy, catch up catch up CATCH UP. Ultimatum is so awesome, in fact, it's LEGENDARY. Rofl.]

Current music: 112 - Cupid

Officemate brought a whole HD full of oldschool sounds. I found some songs that I sorta forgot about but still like very much, like that one. It’s nice to know that there are some songs that seem to be timeless. They’re just so genuinely good — in a sense that they got the music part down so well, that if you appreciate good beats, riffs, lyrics, vocals, arrangement and all that stuff, it doesn’t matter if the song was made 10 or 20 years ago. Good music is good music.

Well sometimes, I catch this morning show on TV while getting ready for work. There’s this one band that I, quite unfortunately, hear during the live performance portion. I won’t name them so I don’t offend any fans, if any, but I’m kinda disappointed by how they go about their music. For one particular band, I don’t mind that they only seem to make ballads, but there is hardly anything in their songs. Basic chord sequence, basic rhythm. It’s not the kind of music that bothers me, and it’s not that it’s simple, because simple songs can be great. It’s the lack of flavor, the lack of that certain something, that lack that gives the songs a shelf-life of about a year tops.

I do think they have talent, but it seems they’ve just settled so comfortably into that idea of making simple ballads, selling them, and getting that fame people so generously give them. And so far, the only compliments I’ve heard about them is that their fans can relate to their lyrics and that their vocalist looks good.

But naturally, this is just my opinion. Not to sound boastful hahaha :P Peace Art.

Anyway, truth is although I do feel strongly about that, that’s not what really I wanna get at. I got to think about a cousin of mine, and the things he’s been up to. I used to see him a lot and we are close, but now if he saw me, he probably couldn’t get past small talk if he tried. Coz he knows that I know, and that I’m disappointed.

People don’t care about all that stuff I just said. They don’t want timeless songs, they want here and now. Music to go with whatever they’re going through at a given moment. And that goes for many other things as well. So where do you draw the line between good change and bad change? How come the people around me seem to be forgetting about the things that shouldn’t change? How come there aren’t many people singing these old songs anymore?

It seems that a lot of people have settled so comfortably into getting what they want, when they want it, the easiest way possible. As if nothing else matters. So maybe I’m the stubborn one, maybe I’m close-minded (or maybe I don’t know the whole story). But the way I see it, there’s no use believing in something if you don’t believe in it with everything you have, everything you know, everything you are. And if there’s nothing you believe in as strongly as that, you better find something. Something no trend can change, because otherwise you’re wandering aimlessly, being taken by the wind. So I hope you got something.

But yeah, you won’t get to read this anyway.

First of all, thank you guys for the encouragement, really. Feels good to know there are people who got my back and all, also who actually read my posts haha. But to tell you the truth, that wasn’t what my problem was. Believe me, I really really like my job (though I can think of ways that it could be um… more efficient, and there are tasks I’d rather do) and I’m enjoying it a lot. It’s just that, though they have their reasons, some people around me don’t think too highly of it. Let’s just say I’m not feeling the support rofl. Anyways, that’s a whole different story that I don’t particularly feel like getting into (ever), I didn’t expect the reaction to be focused on that haha. But I seriously appreciate it guys. :)

As for the rest of it — my incapacitated right hand and uncanny talent for “losing my pencil” when I have to draw — that one’s all me.

Well I helped my mom with grocery shopping after work, and afterwards we realized it was raining. Since we had to push a cart and carry some things, and since the wind was pretty strong, we both got wet despite the umbrella. There was this moment though, when we’d reached the car but I hadn’t gotten in yet, that I just felt so good. I wasn’t feeling down before that or anything, but it made me stand outside in that relatively empty parking area for a few more seconds, despite the rain. That feeling that you just instinctively have to take a deep breath and smile for no apparent reason. That really made my evening. Then instantly, I had an epiphany. No, I’m serious haha.

As the saying goes — if you didn’t vote, you have no right to complain about government officials. Likewise, if you didn’t do anything about your situation, you have no right to complain.

Now I know why I’m always defensive at the end of my posts. I seem to think I can convince myself that I’ve actually done something about it. Heheh.

Is that not one of the best entry titles I’ve ever come up with? Hahaha. Anyways let’s do this wereBear style, since there’s a lot that happened. I will seriously try to post more often, whenever something happens, so it doesn’t pile up like this :P

It’s Game Time

Last week we had a nice game of badminton, 8 of us at the office + EJ’s wifey. Actually that was several games. Even though me and Art were at the bottom of the food chain (so to speak) it was still really fun. In my case, mainly because of the fact that almost the games were caught on video moohaha. Yes, I love documenting.

That was from dinner after the game, JJ taking the pic. Anyways, there were a lot of funny moments, especially since only a few were actually good at the sport. I think they wanna make “sports night” a regular thing, and I’m all for that. I want bowling next, but it’s a little more expensive with the shoe renting and all. So we’ll see.

Dangerous Minds

My brother got back from Laguna yesterday, he was there for three weeks to teach English to some Korean kids, around middle-school age. I remember on his first day, there was a huge mix-up with the rooms and everything, and on his first week he would call to tell how he was having so much trouble with the problem kids. I remember he would say he was so tired, and dealing with them was so stressful, but he’d always send happy text messages at night. That was three weeks with those kids, from the stories he told I was thinking they were the types that teachers give up on.

But last night he was telling me about how graduation went, and how this naughty 11-year-old kid ran up to him and hugged him. Didn’t say anything, just hugged him. Then those naughty boys whom the other teachers didn’t want to have anything to do with, they actually cried and said he was the best teacher.

Looking at their pictures made me think of things — my own teachers and school life, and how despite everything, it was smooth sailing compared to his. It made me remember why my brother wanted to be a teacher in the first place, because I remember seeing him on the day the world told him that it had given up on him.

No matter what other people think or say, I’m not nearly as strong as my brother. Even besides the fact that I get homesick easily, I don’t think I would’ve lasted three weeks there. Well life hasn’t been fair to him, from the very first day of his existence, but I thank and praise God for how he is now, and how his experiences worked out for him. I can’t tell you how proud of him I am today.

My Own Battles

I’m on a dual-monitor setup at work now, and I gotta say it really makes things easier. Well, easier because I can really multitask. But then again multitasking itself is harder, so I have to concentrate more on what I’m doing.

A few months ago my aunt asked, in a slightly condescending tone, why I work there. It ticked me off. I didn’t say anything.

Whenever I’m asked to do something related to arts or design, my world stops. I can almost hear a voice in my head shouting “Get out while you still can!” and my hands don’t do what I want them to do. In fact, my brain doesn’t cooperate either. I’m thinking about a coffeemaker that refuses to make coffee, but makes good shakes. That’s what I’ve become. And I’m desperate to find out why.

But don’t be fooled haha, I’m really great. I mean, everyone’s got hang-ups right? I guess there just comes a time when we all have to deal with them.

Why am I always so defensive at the end of my posts? Weird, haha.

Current music: Yellowcard - Bombers

It’s been exactly a month since my last entry. As you can see, I’ve changed my layout. I had to draw for it, but I didn’t spend too much time on this one really. And now that it’s up I’m not completely happy with it, like it turned out to be the wrong layout to modify after all rofl. I can’t put my finger on it, but there’s just something wrong. Oh well, I’ll be changing this sometime soon again, I guess. Or not.

I haven’t been updating this recently, because frankly, I’ve come to associate blogging with work. I have 5 work blogs that I each have to update thrice a week, and I get to be pretty much myself in them anyways. But of course I’m not killing this one, because it’s the only one where I can ramble like this.

Welcome back to blogging, Kaiz and Art. :)

My life’s pretty much all about work now. My magazine articles (etc) are finally all approved, thank God, so I don’t have to worry about them anymore. I’m looking forward to a task they gave me and Art, thinking up the plot for an MMOG (massively multiplayer online game). I hope I get to be a game master, it’ll be a welcome change from what I do now, not that I’m miserable or anything rofl.

Well, things are moving around me, some real fast, some real slow. It kinda makes me wonder where I am, if there’s a middle ground to it. I mean, it seems that when people decide to speed things up a bit, they go really fast. But when they decide to take things slow they pretty much hit the breaks. Or maybe that’s just how it is with me. It kinda feels like I’m standing still, with a lot of things. Maybe I’m even moving backwards. I guess I’ve come to realize that it’s not life, or work, or other people that make us jaded. They don’t make us uninspired, or sometimes make us feel like we’re going nowhere. It’s really just us. It’s really just me. While I don’t dwell on it, and I usually don’t even feel that way, it still makes me wonder…where am I?

I’m glad there are people who give me that much-needed push once in a while. Like how people still cared to read my entries, and tell me to update hahaha. I guess in many cases, there’s wrong in being too comfortable. In some, I wanna take my chances. In others, I really need to set my goals and priorities straight.

I’m pretty sure this won’t make sense to you guys, I’m just thinking out loud, so to speak. And don’t worry, I’m not depressed or anything rofl. Just the occasional pondering.